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December 16, 2000 - Saturday
Last night, I went over to Andy's to play cards and go out for supper. His friends Jim and Russell were there, and they were all stoned off their asses. Andy and Jim were all happy like a bunch of barely legal naked Japanese schoolgirls prancing around on unicorns, but Russell had his head on the table and didn't say a word.
We ate at Burger Dong, and Russell kept his head on the table the entire time, without saying a word. Towards the end of the meal, he looked up at me, then at Andy...
"Buurp..."
"Uh oh...," I say.
He stands up, turns around, and vomits in a huge puddle on the floor. We were all shocked. The restaurant was empty besides the four of us. The entire Burger Dong crew is at the counter staring at Russell, as are Jim, Andy and I. After about a second, I start roaring laughter, with Jim and Andy following suit. Russell leans down again and hurles onto the floor for a second time when the manager comes out and says, between the three of us laughing, "Could you guys at least get him out of here?"
So Andy takes him to the bathroom.
The manager and a crew member bring out a mop and bucket, and begin cleaning up the mess. It had splattered so badly they were using the mop on the tops of the tables.
After about five minutes in the bathroom, Russell cleans himself up and we head out to the car. "Sorry about the mess," I tell the manager on our way out.
"Don't worry about it," he says.
We roll the car window down in case Russell feels the need to get sick again. I was driving the Hyundai so I didn't feel like explaining to Mom why there was puke all over the backseat of her car. But luckily for us, Russell was silent (he still hadn't said a word the whole night) on the drive back to the farm.
When we got there, Russell stepped out of the car and stood beside it for awhile heaving. After a few minutes, I hear him say "Ohhh...shit."
He stands up and starts walking to the house, "Damn that was some good shit."
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